Title: The road to victory in interpersonal relationships
Colossians (14) The way to victory in interpersonal relationships
(Colossians 3:12-14)
1. Be virtuous
Look at verse 12 of the text. “Therefore, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and longsuffering, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved.” From this verse we can see that election, sanctification, and love are almost identical concepts. The saints are holy and loved beings chosen by God. Even though the waves of problems and hardships come to the saints, never forget that you are a holy and noble being loved by God.
When I look at my own life, the words of a holy person do not come to life very well. The words Jesus said we are the light and salt of the world do not come true. Still, God sees the saints as holy beings. The Apostle Paul mentions five virtues that such a holy being must possess. These are compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and long-suffering.
Compassion means compassionate heart. Mercy means a generous and kind heart. Humility refers to an attitude that humbles oneself, exalts others, and especially exalts God as supreme. Meekness does not mean indecisiveness or weakness, but an attitude of being gentle and embracing everyone and every situation. Long-suffering refers to the virtue of not becoming discouraged, giving up, or turning away from problems. Life is a series of problems. Satan constantly attacks whenever he sees a gap. You must have the virtue of long-suffering to protect yourself and keep your blessings in such a situation.
2. Forgive each other
Look at verse 13 of the text. “If anyone is dissatisfied with anyone, bear with one another and forgive one another, just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you too.” The words ‘each other’ and ‘one another’ are important in this verse. Problems in a relationship usually mean that both parties are responsible. So, we need to forgive and forgive each other. Forgiveness is a virtue in the passive sense of accepting the character, attitude, and behavior of others, and forgiveness is a virtue in the active sense of embracing the character, attitude, and behavior of others.
Asking for forgiveness is not an excuse. So, don't say "I'm sorry" and then say "But." Because forgiveness is mistaken for excuses, we often go to seek forgiveness and come back after fighting. If you want to be forgiven, a sincere word of “I’m sorry” is enough. Forgiveness is also not acquiescence, generosity, or patience. To say “I endured for 10 years” doesn’t mean “I forgave you during that time”, but “I’ve been consulting with you.” Forgiveness is paying a price. Practice that kind of forgiveness.
No one is perfect. You can expose your shortcomings as much as you like. Therefore, when you see the shortcomings of others, do not judge easily. Being wrong doesn't mean you're the wrong person. Forgiveness and forgiveness are not ignoring the wrong parts or blaming them for being good, but not defining the wrong person because of the wrong part. When such acceptance and forgiveness are practiced, the subject who receives acceptance and forgiveness also gains spiritual freedom, but the subject who gives acceptance and forgiveness gains greater freedom in spirit.
3. Add Love
When the Apostle Paul said, “Above all these things, add love” (verse 14), which means that love makes all virtues perfect. In the end, in order to win in a relationship, it is important to have virtue, and it is important to forgive and forgive each other, but the most important thing is love. We are saved through faith in Jesus, so why is love more important than faith? Love is more important than faith because the end is more important than the means. Faith is what relates the soul to God, but love is what makes the soul feel God's.
Have a loving heart. Think about whether there is something you need to love now. Forget the pain of yesterday, do not think about the misfortunes to come, but love the person you need to love now. You never know when he will disappear. Tomorrow may be a cloudy day and you may not be given another chance for a sunny day. If you have something to love today, say it today. So solidify beautiful interpersonal relationships with virtue, forgiveness, and love.
Love is more than acceptance and forgiveness. The world and life are not made up of just right and wrong. Even if the other person is wrong and I am right, I cannot live my life thinking only about what is right and what is wrong. Then think with more love. Justice without love is, on the surface, the most mature, but in fact the most immature. The work of restoration can be seen rapidly when there is a sense of justice and love that knows how to cover it. So build up your virtues, forgive one another, and even add love to win interpersonal victories and prepare for tomorrow's blessings.